Parent of a Teenage Girl

Dear Friendly Advice,
This is the first time I have ever posted a question in an advice column, so here it goes. My teenage daughter has been dating a boy from her school for the past 3 months. At first I thought the idea of her dating someone was fine and would be good for her, but now it seems it has consumed her life. If she is not with him she is either on her cell phone talking to him or texting him every minute of the day. She used to hang out with us as a family but now all she does is go to her room to call him or chat online. We just got her cell phone bill for last month and she is way over on minutes. To make matters worse her report card came in the mail and her grades have dropped significantly.
Her boyfriend seems to be a pretty nice guy from what I know of him but she is devoting every last second of the day to being with him and not concentrating on the things she should be. I am afraid if I put my foot down she will become angry and shut us out even more. I don't want her to be mad at me but I do not know what to do. Can you offer any friendly advice?
Thanks-Parent of a teenager

Dear Parent of a Teenager,
Parents today are so afraid of not being liked by their children that they will fore go their duties and roles as a parent for that of a "friend". Your daughter is experiencing her first love and that is not a bad thing, she is however a teenager and not an adult. She does not know how to work through the new emotions she is now experiencing. She needs to know her boundaries and needs guidance from an adult, specifically from her parents. So drop the "friend" role and give your daughter what she really needs, her parents. Explain to her that dating is a privilege that comes from her following certain guidelines that you have set for her to meet. When she meets those guideline than she keeps her privileges, when she doesn't than those privileges are taken away.
Set limits on how long she can talk on her cell phone, if she goes over on minutes she loses the privileges of her phone for a week or longer. School should be her number one priority and until she can prove to you that she can both date and keep her grade up, dating will be out of the question. Explain to her that time with the family is important because she plays a key role in the family unit.
Get to know the person your child is dating, have this young man over to the house on multiple occasion's and make sure he has a positive influence in your daughter life and not a destructive one.
Lastly, remember your the parent and she needs you for guidance and structure to ensure that she will make the right decisions for her future.