An Age Old Question

There seems to be a small window of time that is afforded to my wife and I each day, it is not much time but time, none the less, where we can take a deep breath, talk to one another face to face, without distraction. This brief moment seems to arrive like clockwork each night, it is found amidst the glow of nightlights, teddy bears, and bedtime story books that have been scatter across the floor. This reunion of sorts can not begin until the last child, our four, has finally succeeded in her valiant and courageous battle to stay awake.

Finally, as eyes meet, we both smile knowing we have endured yet another day filled with work, parenting, school, church callings, meals, and everyday life. It is during this time that we as a couple evaluate the day we had and the day to come. Some of our most deep heartfelt conversations and revelations have been felt during this quiet time in the night. We often ask one another questions and seek out possible answers that will appease our souls, which will in turn, hopefully enable us to rest well on that night.

After the baby finally fell asleep and teeth had been brushed my wife asked me a question, "I spoke with my sister today, she had a few questions about life and struggles. She wanted to know why bad things happen to good people?"

This was not the first occasion this question had been posed to me, I have found myself in numerous conversations with family, friends, and acquaintances on this very subject. And yet, I have found myself in each conversation attempting to extract the real meaning behind that question.
As we discussed other matters of the heart we continually came back to that first question asked by her sister.

It is apparent throughout the scriptures that men have struggled with this very concept from the beginning of time. The story of Cain and Abel is the first recorded incident of its kind.
Both sons to Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel chose different paths in life. Abel hearkened unto the voice of the Lord and was a righteous man, while Cain enraged with jealously of his younger brother chose to follow the voice of Satan, which is clearly stated in Moses 5:18 "And Cain loved Satan more than God." Following the promptings of Satan, Cain takes the life of his innocent brother.

We discussed the story of Job found in the Old Testament. Job is plagued with more tragedy and afflictions than one man should have to bear. His great sufferings are revealed in a single quote spoken to him from his wife. After he has been smitten with boils across his entire body, she say to Job, " Dost thou still retain thine integrity? curse God, and die." This coming from his companion and spouse, who no doubt, struggled watching her husband suffer, as much as he did.

What made these families continue to live righteous lives after enduring such hardship? Why didn't they do as Job's wife had suggested and "curse God" when they found themselves in the midst of calamity and trials?

In each of the conversations I have had regarding this question I found it was always used to mask a deeper issue and question that the individual was struggling with. This question is really a precursor to these following thoughts; How can I believe in a loving God if he allows this to happen? Can I ultimately trust and love a God who is willing to allow me as his child to suffer? If there really was a God would he allow this to happen?

An individuals core beliefs can be so shaken that they begin to doubt the mere existence of God. With each story found in the scriptures we are expected to extract the lessons being taught and apply them to our own lives, this is no easy task. Often times it is not until we find ourselves in similar situations can we fully appreciate and understand what is being taught to us.

If I may, let me share a personal story that shaped my opinions and thoughts regarding this age old questions.

As a young boy growing up I looked up to my father, as most young boys do. I literally thought he was Superman and entrusted with a wide array of superpowers! My father was a salesman by trade and this required him to travel quite frequently.
Many times we would join our Father on his sales trips, we would play at the hotel swimming pool, take in a few local sights, and of course eat junk food! The one thing that amazed me about my Father as a young child was how many people he knew. It didn't matter where we were in our many travels across the Northwestern states someone always knew my Dad.
I had lost count as a child how many time I heard a stranger tell me, "You've got one great Dad!" I overheard countless stories about how he helped someone in need and others talking about his honesty and integrity. Never once did I encounter a negative word uttered from someone regarding my Father. This left a large impression that was quickly formed in my mind as a young adolescent child.
My Father was my hero and what I felt was an example of someone living a good and righteous life.
At age 15 my Father became very ill and he was rushed into the hospital. For several days Doctors and nurses attended to him, running every test imaginable, in a race to find out what was wrong before it was to late. The doctors had warned my mother that he may not have much time to live. I can still remember sitting in algebra class, staring at the chalkboard, worrying about my father, when a beep over the PA system disrupted our class. The voice over the speaker said, "Jon & Rob, please come to the front office." Rob is my older brother who was in school that day also. I grabbed my backpack and ran out of class and headed straight to the office. My older brother was already there, "Dad might not make it, we need to get to the hospital." That seemed to be the longest ride of my life as my brother weaved in and out of traffic in our old GMC truck. Along the way there was silence between my brother and I, both of us praying silently we would have one last chance to see our Dad.
My prayers were direct as I pleaded and begged for my Father's life. As we pulled into the hospital parking lot we both slammed the truck doors and rushed off into the front lobby. Most of my family was there standing in the waiting room, eyes were red and filled with tears. There had not been to many times in my life before this experience where I had been afraid or scared as I was at that moment. My Superman, had fallen and I wasn't sure if he was ever going to get back up.
After several more days of this similar routine, my Father begin to regain strength. He had however suffered several strokes that caused him to lose much of his memory and speech. We later took him home to care for him ourselves within the confines of our home. The breaking moment for me as a young teenager was taking my Father dinner in bed and having him peer into my eyes as if I were a stranger. He no longer knew who I was. Withholding my tears in front of him, I quickly escaped to my room and secretly cried. My sadness and frustration for the situation quickly changed to anger and the age old question, crossed my mind. How could God allow this to happen to my dad? He was such a great man, how could this happen?
The answer to that question did not come to me that night or the next. It wasn't until several years later that I came to understand why God had allowed this to happen to my dad.
Over the next few years my Dad regained most of his long term memory and some of his speech, he knew who I was at least!! It was in the following years where I could see the reason behind such a horrific event within my family. Although, my Father was Superman to me at a young age, he was often never home. He was one of the hardest workers I have ever known and this resulted in his absent for a lot of our family functions and milestones. I knew he loved us and worked hard to put food on the table and clothes on our backs, but he wasn't always there. After the strokes and medical conditions he slowly got better and even though he is not the same Superman Father I once knew he has now put on a different cape and my admiration and love for him has grown on a whole new level.
The experience of almost losing my Dad and watching him struggle on a daily basis was indeed horrific, but the blessings that came from that event I would not change for the world. He is no longer absent from my life.
The lesson I learned from that event in my life was that I lack the eternal perspective that God has, I am unable to see the entire picture as He can. God knows what we need to help shape us into the individuals He sees we can become.
The true test is whether we believe that or not, is found when God places us in times of struggle to see how we will react, if we will believe, if we will trust him. It is only after that test will he show us his infinite wisdom behind those trials and tribulations we must face.
The prophet Joseph Smith endured much persecution and tribulation and yet he too after several months confined to a small basement jail utters the words, " O God, where art thou?" The answer obtained by Joseph Smith's plea would for ever change the prophet's outlook on life's struggles. God answers him saying, " My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes."
What a beautiful answer given to the Prophet in his time of need. We must remember that our suffering will be but a small moment in the realms of the eternities and if we stay faithful and believe in God despite our afflictions we can be exalted on high.
Bad things happen to Good people, but if we continue to believe in God, trust in him, we can endure any trial or struggle placed before us, holding fast to the promise given to the prophets that if we endure it well we will be okay.
We know who our true friends are when things are not going well, they are there standing beside us through thick and thin. God, likewise finds out those who truly believe in Him, when things are not going so well.
I am not sure if this post answered the age old question, "why bad things happen to good people" or raised more questions? Because of my experiences as a young adult I will put my trust and faith in God and attempt to expand my eternal perspective and believe, if I weather the storm and endure it well, I too will be blessed.